i have been struggling for a few weeks with writing this post and after reading a blog today i knew that i needed to. please read the whole thing and don't stop its a story of miracles and hope and a special story that makes me believe that miracles do happen.
for most people having a baby is a simple thing. sex, positive test, and 9 months later a baby but for some couples its not so simple. for these couples it becomes worry, negative pregnancy tests, tears, drs, blood draws, more negative tests, injections, hormones, being told they will never conceive, 2nd options, surgeries, more tears and more drs and more heartache as the cycle just keeps repeating. And then for a few special couples something magical happens... a positive pregnancy test. with this positive test a whole new series of worries and questions. positives tests become 12 weeks, then 20, then 30 and then tears of sorrow become tears of joy and happiness as a baby girl is laid on her mothers chest for the first time. for this special couple it was 8 years in the making to bring this baby into the world. all the hope and tears and worrying and waiting for a miracle to happen when they were told it would never conceive a child of their own and a miracle happens. this baby girl is a miracle that god gave this special couple. no this couple is not me and my husband as we were bless to conceive shortly after trying, nor is it close friends although we have had many close friends go thru these struggles... its my parents. i am that baby girl, that miracle that god gave my parents. i am that hope that was never given up on and the miracle that was always wanted. and 29 years later i am writing to let these couples know to never give up on hope or miracles.
I read blogs about people who have these struggles. i cry tears of joy when they find out they are pregnant and tears of sorrow when they loose the pregnancy and tears of happiness when 9 months later they have a beautiful baby. these people never know that i look as i don't know what to say. i have never gone thru what they are going thru and i feel horrible that i have a baby after trying for a short time. i would love to be able to carry a child for them however with high blood pressure its not an option although i have discussed it with the hubby. after reading these couples struggles for a baby i can not justify having a second child. what give me the right to have another child when so many people cant have one of their own? all i want is for these people who so desperately want a child, a child they carry on their own to have a baby. to experience the feeling of a baby inside their belly to labor to first smiles and first laughs, to the joy of watching in amazement their eyes light up at everything b/c its all new, to crawling and pulling up to walking to first days of school and first loves, first heartbreaks, college, marriage and finally a baby of their own. i want these couples to have all of this and for them to have the joy of what my parents have and the miracle of that sweet baby girl that was place on my mothers chest. I read these couples blogs and wish and pray for them to have a baby. my track record with these couples is fairly good i might add. i know that its only hoping and wishing but out of 6 people i have read their struggles daily, 2 have had babies, 2 are pregnant right now and 2 are going to be soon... i can feel it. i just want to let these people know that others are out there for them thinking and praying and wishing for a miracle as much as they are.